like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
