the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
