I'd wear matching sweaters with you
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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