In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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