Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I want to make a zoo with you.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
