A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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