Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
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