Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize