also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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