that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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