it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Randomize