I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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