his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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