exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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