You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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