I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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