So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I would fuck him just for his dog
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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