Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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