Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize