let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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