if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
