It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
