WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
