You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
