i would punch a child for taco bell
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
