He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
