is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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