I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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