she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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