Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
