she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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