Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
