Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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