brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
