U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
