the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize