I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
