He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He passed out mid-signature
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
