k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
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