Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
