I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
