if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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