all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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