that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize