Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
