normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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