; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
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