Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Will exercising make me less horny?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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