so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
