Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
