thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
