I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
